Motel Round 1 of ___?

I am PRAYING there are not more rounds at the motel, but the way Mr. M drinks, it is unlikely. He is in the hospital for round 2 now but I need to back track a little to explain how he got there from here.

I had dropped him off at the $45 a night motel (this is the type of motel I drive by all the time when I am in this area and think WHO stays there????, well, now I know!). I TRIED not to call him because he was making his choice. I think I broke down and called him once and it went to voice mail and another time and he answered. What pointless calls. Why did it still meet such a need in me to call? And yet it was SO unfulfilling.

After that HE called ME once or twice a day to check in and tell me he was alive. I waited on pins and needles for these calls. Every time I would eventually ask "Are you still wanting to drink or do you want to go get some help?" and he would slur that he still wanted to drink more. I told him when he was ready, I would come get him and take him to the hospital.

He was having excruciating pain in his stomach my friend "T" had me convinced it was acute pancreatitis (which it absolutely could've been). This can be deadly or have otherwise horrific long-term consequences.

He checked in on wednesday morning and finally, on Friday, he started talking about maybe being ready to go... not because he wanted to stop drinking, but because he was in so much pain. (I was not encouraged that this would actually result in sobriety... it felt too soon.) He said he was getting ready to go but didn't know WHO would take him.

I had offered multiple times yet he was still doing that "hinting around" thing. So my thinking was, he either didn't hear me, in which case I am not obligated OR he is manipulating and wanting me to offer again instead of just asking. Either way, I was no longer super into going. I didn't want to go into that hotel room with the cockroaches he said were everywhere. I did not want to have to gather all his stuff. I did not want to see him like that (or SMELL him like that!) I did not want to worry about him barfing in the car. It just all sounded like something I did not want to put myself through.

I told him his AA friend Tweb would come get him. I called Tweb because Mr. M's phone was dying (ENABLING!) and Tweb and a buddy went to get him and took him to the hospital. He went and - because of the pain - was checked in to the normal "Med/Surge" floor and was given dilaudid for pain (do you give a drunk an ultra strong narcotic???!!!). I tried to call and check his status and they would NOT talk to me over the phone. I didn't want to have to go there, but I did want to know they were testing him for pancreatitis. It is SO hard to strike the balance between 'tough love' and wisdom... I certainly haven't struck it yet.

But I DO have to say I am proud of myself that I arrived so quickly and firmly at the decision and have stuck to my guns while still managing to be (mostly) loving and kind.