I have been really grappling with sadness.
A heavy, weighty sadness sitting on my heart & shoulders almost all of the time.
It's like a companion that I am becoming used to having accompany me every where I go.
When - for a moment - I am happy or light or free, it almost feels unfamiliar and then it is back, sitting on me again after only a few moments of respite.
My therapy feels slow.
I feel frustrated with my lack of progress.
I can't imagine 20 years of dealing. I am still young. But the past 6 months of sadness I've experienced have been devastating. Keep going, keep trying. Obviously you get up every morning and go about your day and take care of your children. Something you think "of course I do that! I have to." But some people cave and completely waste away. You're still strong. Keep going, keep breathing. You'll get there.
ReplyDeleteThanks anonymous!
ReplyDeleteYes, as the program says, we need to "keep on keeping on". Such wisdom in those little slogans!
I am not giving up.
I am just trying to learn to live with my feelings (even sadness and fear and loneliness) instead of slapping on a happy face, or being tough, or acting like everything is fine and i don't need anything from anyone.
I still have a lot of work to do, but I feel like - even in the midst of my sadness - I am still making progress!!!